Our darling girl is 6!!!!!! She's a big girl, in big girl school, doing big girl things like reading, writing and picking out her own outfits. She grows more capable every day but thank goodness she still holds my hand, wants me by her side, fits on my hip and misses me during long days at school.
These annual posts on my journey as a mother are my most favorite to write because of all the things I do, being wife and mother are my most important. They are purposeful roles God has bestowed upon me and I pray I steward them well.
Here are the last 5 years of confessionals ...
Confessions of my 1st Year
Confessions of my 2nd Year
Confessions of my 3rd Year
Confessions of my 4th Year
Confessions of my 5th Year
A lot has stayed the same year after year. I maintain a strict schedule, wake up at 5am every day to do ALL the things, exercise daily, cover her in kisses every chance I get, dress us alike, still struggle with art and messes, but most importantly I continue to put down the to do list to play and have fun!
My Confessions of my 6th Year of Motherhood ...
I SAY YES
I thrive in the confines of routine and structure but I'm working toward embracing a little spontaneity here and there. I found myself embracing the ability to say yes and doing it. Yes I can play that game with you, yes I can read that book, yes we can have a treat, yes we can go out to dinner tonight, and yes you can wear that.
I'M AN INFLUENCER
Not like you think! I'm striving to shine my light to an audience of other mothers in my season. I completed a year co-leading a Mothers of Preschoolers ministry and decided to continue those efforts as an elementary school mother by hosting gatherings of mothers from Vivian's school quarterly in my home.
I'm passionate about creating community and loving my neighbors!
I love friends and want friends for myself and others. Despite being ordinary I can make extraordinary impacts.
I'M A LADY OF THE AFTERNOON
For 4 years Vivian was in half day preschool and took a nap each afternoon without fail until she was nearly 5. This past year I didn't have the afternoon nap to work or have some quiet time to myself. It was quite the adjustment for me as that was a productive time but it became a fun time with more opportunities for us. When kindergarten came gracious did I mourn the loss of the toddler years (I cried nearly every morning) but I slowly but surely came to enjoy my afternoons. I increased my scope at work and enjoy being out and about on errands or with friends past 12:45!!!
I completed my second year at my job and couldn't be prouder. I find that work and motherhood are at constant odds. Motherhood is the greatest work I do but I also value and miss the career I chose to step away from. The role I'm in now, working from home part time, fits well for my circumstances. Ryan continues to work long shifts primarily nights & weekends and I am privileged to be available for Vivian.
Contributing to my boss's business is very rewarding, in fact, this job while far from the salary of my career has been the best I've ever had! It has provided me a specific purpose that fulfills me uniquely from motherhood. Also my boss is wonderful and appreciates me greatly!
I manage a lot of tasks and responsibilities. Some mundane, some specific to our family. some I've created and some I wish were not on my list (like the dog!). I make a lot and I mean a lot of lists, reference my planner and do the best I can, to do what I can, when I can. The interruptions and unexpected come every day without fail but I'm trying to pivot and embrace. There's never enough time or hands but at the end of the day it all works out.
I motivate Vivian in her endeavors as much as I can. She loves dance, gymnastics and soccer. She works so hard to improve her skills and in times of confidence and challenge I cheer her on. Watching her put in the effort each week makes me so proud. I'm happy to have the means to provide these for her and maybe it's because I only have one child, I don't mind taking her. In fact these are the times I'm productive as I sit at a table and can work uninterrupted.
I go out a little more, don't get my feathers ruffled as much if either of us stay up past our bed times, I rest a little more and finish my to-do list a little less often. I want to enjoy this beautiful life I've been given by having as much fun as possible.
Vivian watches me now more than ever. She picks up on every word, mannerism and action I make. I want to model a gentle spirit for her (help me Jesus!). With a lot of prayer and time in His word I'm working to show her how Jesus would have us live. I miss the mark so often but it's then that I model apologies and forgiveness. Showing her, I've found, is the best teaching tool and at the same time shapes me into the mother I want to be.
A travel agent that is. I feel this one is a bit of an exaggeration but it sounds so cool. I didn't grow up traveling and until last year at my 40th birthday I didn't really believe it was an option for me. Sure we go to the beach, visit friends and dream about visiting far off places but now I actually want to book the trips.
I tend to be practical with time and money (well with some fashionable exceptions) however I was encouraged by a dear friend that dreams can come true and waiting isn't the only option. I want to have experiences for myself and with my family full of adventurous activities and beautiful sites.
We even took a trip rather than a party for Vivian's 6th birthday!
Oh the places I plan to go!
I'M BRAVE
7 years ago in the midst of immense grief my OB held my hands before taking me back to the OR and told me I was brave! He said I was brave for wanting to be a mother.
It is bravery to embark on so much unknown in a world of so much uncertainty. It is brave to sacrifice for the wellbeing of another. I am brave and will continue to be each and every day I am privileged to be a mother.
Dress Beautifully in Motherhood
XOXO Sarah Louise
